Tryin Not to Love You
by Plybnct
Summary: When Robin is forced to leave because of his wife, Regina is drowning her sorrows at Granny's when a certain blonde Sheriff offers comfort in the form of shots. SwanQueen. Complete for now, I may add another chapter later.
1. Chapter 1

**Trying not to love you.**

**_This is something that came to mind when I was listening to a Nickleback song. I don't own the song nor the Once Upon a Time characters, I'm just borrowing them. I hope you guys like this and that it doesn't suck too much._**

Emma is sitting at the bar at Granny's thinking about the best night of her life which brought about the worst morning of her life.

**You call to me, and I fall at your feet**

**How could anyone ask for more?**

_It started when Emma walked into said restaurant seeing a forlorn looking Regina sitting on one of the stools, staring into her glass of liquor. "I'm not in the mood for a hope speech." The brunette grits, glaring into her drink._

"_I'm not here for a pep talk; I think you need a drinking buddy right now." Emma smirks, taking a seat next to the broken woman next to her. "I'm thinking shots, you?"_

"_Sure, why not?" Regina sighs, smiling slightly at her friend? She wasn't even sure._

_They drank and laughed for hours. "You know, Robin was an atrocious lover." The brunette whispers, but comes out louder than she would've intended._

_Emma chuckles at the horrid look on Regina's face as she slurs about her lost lover. "Well, I figured as much." She grumbles, her jealousy rising at the thought of the gorgeous brunette with anyone but her._

"_Is that jealousy I hear Miss Swan?" Regina teases, nudging a blushing Emma._

_The blonde is quick to deflect. "No... I just think that he wasn't worth your time is all."_

_Regina smiles slightly at that. "And who do you think IS worth my time, Miss Swan?" She flirts in her uninhibited state of mind._

_Emma stiffens at that remark, not wanting to blurt out what she really thinks, but the alcohol is making it hard to keep her from spilling her guts, that she has been in love with the Evil Queen since Neverland, maybe even before, she wasn't entirely sure. Plus since she regained her memories, that year apart from Regina was pure torture. "Maybe someone who knows the real you and is willing to love you for you, faults and all." She mumbles._

**And our time apart, like knives in my heart **

**How could anyone ask for more?**

_The brunette gives her a side long glance, biting her lip. "Someone like you?"_

"_Maybe?" Emma gets out; afraid she may have ruined their fragile relationship._

"_Then show me, Miss Swan." Regina purrs into her ear._

_The rest of the night was kind of a blur to Emma. She remembers dragging an equally drunk Regina out of the Diner and pushing her up against a wall kissing her with abandon, hoping the other woman could feel how much she meant to her._

_They had made it back to the ex-Evil Queen's house, groping and kissing the whole way. Regina had poofed them there. Emma laid her soon to be lover on the king sized bed, eyes dark with lust and love at the sight of Regina with her emotional walls completely down._

"_Strip Sheriff." Regina says in her Queen voice._

_Emma did as she was told, making a show out of slowly unbuttoning her shirt; she let it slide off of her shoulders onto the floor. As she was teasingly running her thumbs around the waistband of her jeans, she was surprised when her thumbs suddenly came into contact with her skin. "Hey…!"_

_The brunette gave her a smoldering look. "You were taking far too long, dear." Is said as Regina grabs her around the waist and pulls Emma onto her lap._

"_Well my Queen, I think you are wearing way too many clothes." Emma smirks, making a move to slip her hands under Regina's white shirt. As soon as Emma's hands touch the brunette's skin, they both feel a small spark, but neither is deterred by it at the moment._

_The blonde had the Mayor's shirt bunched up around her breasts as she slowly ran her hands up and over the silky fabric of the panting brunette's bra. Regina was getting impatient, the throb between her thighs becoming almost unbearable. _

_With a snap of her fingers, all of her clothes were removed, leaving both women completely naked. When Emma's hands once again suddenly came into contact with warm flesh, she smirked, squeezing the brunette's soft mounds. "Someone's impatient." She chuckles, leaning down taking a stiff bud into her mouth. _

"_Mmm, Emma." Regina moaned out, lacing her fingers through golden locks, bringing the Savior's head closer._

"You want the regular Em?" Ruby asked, breaking Emma from her thoughts of last night.

"Yeah, that'll be fine." Emma sighs, laying her head on top of her folded arms on the counter.

**But if there's a pill to help me forget,**

**God knows I haven't found it yet**

**But I'm dying to, God I'm trying to**

**'Cause trying not to love you, only goes so far**

**Trying not to need you, is tearing me apart**

**Can't see the silver lining, from down here on the floor**

**And I just keep on trying, but I don't know what for**

**'Cause trying not to love you**

**Only makes me love you more **

She stayed like that for a bit, a part of her wishing she could just forget what happened, but the other half knowing that even though it hurt like hell to be rejected after an amazing night with the woman she loves, it was worth the pain.

**And this kind of pain, only time takes away**

**That's why it's harder to let you go**

**And nothing I can do, without thinking of you**

**That's why it's harder to let you go**

"Here ya go Ems." Ruby said cheerily as she placed the cup of hot chocolate with cinnamon in front of the blonde. "You ok?" She asked concerned.

Emma lifted her head up, acknowledging her friend. "Yeah, it's nothing Rubes, just tired is all."

"Ok, but if ya need anything, you know I'm always here." Ruby said as she made her way over to the other customers.

Emma took a sip of her drink, staring off into space. _"Harder Emma, please." Is moaned into her ear and she picks up the pace of her fingers that are buried in the brunette. "Y-yes!" Regina squealed, her orgasm fast approaching. At hearing her lover's vocalization, Emma curls her fingers and rubs against the spongy spot inside Regina, causing her eyes to roll into the back of her head and her back arch up from the bed, a silent scream on her lips._

**But if there's a pill to help me forget,**

**God knows I haven't found it yet**

**But I'm dying to, God I'm trying to**

**'Cause trying not to love you, only goes so far**

**Trying not to need you, is tearing me apart**

**Can't see the silver lining, from down here on the floor**

**And I just keep on trying, but I don't know what for**

**'Cause trying not to love you**

**Only makes me love you more**

"_That was amazing." Regina panted, head falling back against her pillow. Emma laid her head on top of the brunette's chest and just listened to her slowly regulating heartbeat. She soon fell asleep with a smile on her lips as she listened to the evened out breaths of her lover._

**So I sit here divided, just talking to myself **

Emma stared into her drink, mumbling to herself. "Maybe Robin really is her soul mate."

**Was it something that I did?**

"_Why are you laying on top of me Miss Swan?" Emma hears, she lifts her head off of Regina's chest and scrubs at her eyes. _

"_Hey." She mumbles sleepily, giving the other woman a wide smile, but falters at the cold glare Regina is sending her way. "I thought you… never mind." Emma sighs, getting out of the bed. She finds her clothes on the floor and dresses immediately._

_Before she can leave, "Oh and Miss Swan, what happened here, does not leave this room. Understand?" Regina asks the broken blonde in an emotionless tone. She waits until she gets to her car to completely break down._

**Was there somebody else?**

"Fucking Robin Hood!" Emma seethes under her breath.

**When a voice from behind me, that was fighting back tears**

**Sat right down beside me, and whispered right in my ear**

**Tonight I'm dying to tell you**

The blonde is roused from her thoughts as she hears the voice she thought she wouldn't hear in a while. "I never loved Robin, Emma…" Regina starts, but chokes back a sob.

"So I was just a rebound then?" Emma asks, void of emotion.

Regina sits down next to her Sheriff. "No, you weren't… I-I felt bad for acting the way I did this morning; I never should've said what I did… I got scared, but no matter how much I want to fight these feelings for you, I can't. It only makes me love you more." The brunette admits, laying her heart on the line.

**That trying not to love you, only went so far**

**Trying not to need you, was tearing me apart**

**Now I see the silver lining, from what we're fighting for**

Emma turns towards Regina, "I won't lie and say you didn't hurt me, but I think that… I could, forgive you, in time." She replies honestly, flashing Regina a small smile.

The Mayor nods her head in acceptance. "I will do everything in my power to earn your forgiveness Emma." She tells her love with determination. "Maybe we could talk more over drinks at my place tonight?"

"Maybe." Emma smiles, lacing her fingers through Regina's, giving the dark woman's hand a small squeeze.

**And if we just keep on trying, we could be much more**

**'Cause trying not to love you**

**Oh, yeah, trying not to love you**

**Only makes me love you more**

**Only makes me love you more**


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two: I need to hear you say…

_**I don't own Once Upon a Time nor the song in the story, I'm just borrowing them. Thanks for reading, reviews welcomed. If there are any errors, I'm sorry, I'm still kinda new to this.**_

After Emma left the house, slamming the door on her way out; Regina was upstairs in her bed, arms wrapped around her legs and sobbing uncontrollably. She hated herself for freaking out and falling back into familiar territory and being a closed off bitch. "I didn't mean it." She whispers into the empty room.

She knew she had to get up for work, so she took a deep breath and got ready. Once she had every hair in place and making sure her power suit was in pristine condition, she left for the office.

Thoughts of the night before plagued her mind; she just couldn't get the taste of Emma's addicting kisses out of her mind, or the soft feel of her skin. Regina had never had a lover that was as gentle and loving towards her, not even Robin; he was like all the others, but she wanted to believe different because of that damn book.

**This time, this place misused, mistakes**

**Too long, too late, who was I to make you wait?**

Lost in thought, she finds unmoving near Granny's Diner, she looks up and sees the one person that has been on her mind far more than one night. Emma, there she was, plain as day sitting with her head lying atop her folded arms on the bar, her signature morning hot chocolate in front of her no doubt.

Regina knew she had a choice to make, walk away or go in and ask Emma for forgiveness and see if there's any way possible to fix what she had fucked up. The former Queen knew at that moment, looking at her Savior through the window of the diner, that she herself would go through hell or high water to get her woman.

"Fucking Robin Hood!" Regina hears Emma seethe under her breath, head still resting on her arms.

**Just one chance, just one breath**

**Just in case there's just one left**

The blonde is roused from her thoughts as she hears the voice she thought she wouldn't hear in a while. "I never loved Robin, Emma…" Regina starts, but chokes back a sob.

"So I was just a rebound then?" Emma asks, void of emotion; that look in itself cut Regina deeper than she would ever admit.

**'Cause you know you know, you know…**

Regina sits down next to her Sheriff. "No, you weren't… I-I feel bad for acting the way I did this morning; I never should've said what I did… I got scared, but no matter how much I want to fight these feelings for you, I can't. It only makes me love you more." The brunette admits, laying her heart on the line.

**That I love you I have loved you all along and I miss you**

**Been far away for far too long**

Regina feels like her heart is going to beat out of her chest it's beating so hard as she waits for the blonde to respond. Thankfully she does, "I won't lie and say you didn't hurt me, but I think that… I could, forgive you, in time." She replies honestly, flashing Regina a small smile.

The Mayor nods her head in acceptance. "I will do everything in my power to earn your forgiveness Emma." She tells her love with determination. "Maybe we could talk more over drinks at my place tonight?"

**I keep dreaming you'll be with me and you'll never go**

**Stop breathing if I don't see you anymore**

"Maybe." Emma smiles, lacing her fingers through Regina's, giving the dark woman's hand a small squeeze; Regina smiled back, hoping that she'll be able to win the blonde over.

**On my knees, I'll ask last chance for one last dance**

**'Cause with you, I'd withstand**

**All of hell to hold your hand**

The Mayor had been running around her house in a frenzy, cleaning things that didn't need cleaned, making sure the lasagna was baking properly and checking her makeup and hair every few minutes. She wrung her hands together and flattened out any unwanted creases in her tight black dress as she waited for her dinner guest.

She heard the doorbell ring and almost sprained her ankle in the high heels she was wearing racing to the door. When it was opened, the sight of the beautiful woman on the other side made her heart skip a beat.

Emma was dressed in her usual attire, but her makeup was subtle yet alluring and Regina noticed that she had curled her hair to perfection; either way, she would always be perfection in the older woman's eyes. "Hey, I… uh, got ya these." Emma says, blushing slightly as she hands Regina the beautiful bouquet of red roses.

Regina smells the flowers, her face breaking out in a huge sappy smile. "These are lovely Emma, why don't you come on in dear?" She asks as she ushers the blonde into the huge mansion.

The blonde sniffs the air, a broad smile breaking across her face. "Is that your famous lasagna I smell?" She asks, licking her lips.

"Yes it is my dear, but it still has a few minutes to cook." Regina informs, moving towards her little bar. "Would you like something to drink while we wait?" She smiles slightly at the blonde.

Emma tilts her head in confusion, she feels like she's in the Twilight Zone, because Regina is acting hospitable, charming, and even smiling. "Are you ok Regina?"

Regina chuckles at the lost and confused look on Emma's face. "Yes dear, honestly I'm taking a chance and lowering my walls for you; I want you to know I can be a loving person, given time." She confesses.

**I'd give it all I'd give for us**

**Give anything, but I won't give up**

**'Cause you know you know, you know…**

The younger woman smiles widely at Regina. "That's the second time you in a way told me ya love me."

**I love you I have loved you all along and I miss you**

"Does it bother you?" Regina asks uncertainly, staring into her glass of cider.

Emma shakes her head. "No, it's fine." She smiles, making her way over to the older woman. When she reaches her, she lifts Regina's chin. "I'm going to kiss you now." Once Regina nods her head slightly, Emma leans in and plants a chaste kiss on Regina's lips.

**Been far away for far too long**

The small amount of affection isn't enough for Regina, so before Emma can pull away, she crashes their lips together in a passionate kiss, letting all of her love flow through it. They both gasp when they feel the same spark they felt the night before, and yet again ignore it.

**I keep dreaming you'll be with me and you'll never go**

**Stop breathing if I don't see you anymore**

Regina pulls out of the kiss first, panting. "I think the food is done." She smiles, leaning her head against Emma's.

"Yeah, don't wanna set the house on fire, huh?" She teases, causing the other woman to chuckle as she goes into the kitchen. Emma watches the sway of Regina's hips as she follows her into said room.

They eat dinner in a peaceful silence, except for the occasional hum or moan from Emma, who was eating the food with abandon. "Mmm Regina, this is sooo good." She moan around a mouthful of lasagna.

Regina chuckled at the blonde who was shoveling food into her mouth. "Thank you dear." Regina smirks, shaking her head at the younger woman. 'She's just too cute and she doesn't even know it.' She thinks to herself as she sips on her cider.

After dinner is cleaned up, Regina pulls Emma to her by her hips. With a fear of rejection reflected in her eyes. "I've been so far away, emotionally I mean, but I know you deserve more; I'm willing to give that to you."

**So far away, so far away**

**Been far away for far too long**

**So far away, so far away**

**Been far away for far too long**

**But you know, you know, you know…**

They make their way upstairs, shedding clothes along the way and when they get to Regina's bedroom, they're only in their bra and underwear. "I need to see all of you Gina." Emma whispers into the older woman's ear, as she sheds her of her undergarments.

"Take me Emma." Regina moans out, scraping her nails up and down Emma's sides.

The two women make love to one another throughout most of the night, exploring each other's sensitive spots, mapping each other out with lips and tongue.

Emma rolls on top of Regina, laying her head on the Queen's chest as she wraps her arms around her slim waist. "You're staying?" Regina tentatively asks, wrapping a wild wisp of blonde hair around her finger.

**I wanted, I wanted you to stay**

**'Cause I needed, I need to hear you say…**

"Yeah, I am." Emma says as she gets comfortable on the other woman. Before sleep can take the Savoir, she utters the words that Regina had been waiting to hear forever. "I love you Regina, since the first day we met." She mumbled before falling asleep.

**That I love you, I have loved you all along**

The morning after is so much different than the last, Emma wakes to a smiling Regina, who is running her finger through her long blonde hair. "Morning dear." She rasps, sleep still heavy in her voice; which is totally sexy in Emma's opinion. She then gets a serious look on her face. " Emma, is there anyway you can forgive me?" Regina asks, tears glistening in her eyes.

"Of course I do, if I didn't I wouldn't be here."

**And I forgive you, for being away for far too long**

"I love you Emma." Regina smiles softly at her lover.

Emma takes a deep breath. "I love you Regina, I have for a while."

"Now that you're mine, I'm never letting go." The older woman confesses.

**So keep breathing, 'cause I'm not leaving**

**Hold on to me and never let me go**

The blonde laughs. "That's a good thing, cause you're stuck with me now." She smiles, leaning into Regina to plant a series of kisses along her jaw and neck, finally ending up at her lips. Emma kissed her with abandon, and Regina kissed back with the promise of forever. "I'll never let you go again." Regina whispers as the two continue to kiss.

**Keep breathing, 'cause I'm not leaving you anymore**

**Believe it, hold on to me and**

**Never let me go, keep breathing**

**Hold on to me and never let me go (Keep breathing)**

**Hold on to me and never let me go.**


End file.
